Posts Tagged ‘communicate

20
May
23

Fuel vs. Friction

I begin today with a thank you to whoever invented podcasts.

So, “Thanks, podcast inventor.” (Actually, Google tells me podcasts were invented in 2004 by Adam Curry and Dave Winer. Thanks Adam and Dave.). 

I like podcasts because they are the things that keep my mind off what is happening to my body while I toil and sweat at the gym.

Sometimes I pick a podcast for its fun and entertainment value. Mostly though I try to find one that is enlightening or edifying. And sometimes these of the latter variety stick with me and keep my wheels turning long after I’ve gone home, showered, and changed clothes.

Last year (June 9, 2022 to be exact), I told you about one of my favorite podcasts, called Hidden Brain. (Found here). Why it is called that I really don’t know. What I do know is that it is almost always a source of surprising insight and revelation. 

Yesterday’s installment featured an interview with Prof. Loran Nordgren who is an author and organizational psychologist at the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University. You may find him here

I was most captivated when Prof. Nordgren began talking about the way organizations seek to influence people’s behavior. He said that when a company wants you to take an action (such as buying a product), they develop their U.S.P. (also called the “Unique Selling Proposition”), and then FUEL it with slick packaging, clever advertising, strategic distribution, and attractive pricing. If you and I don’t bite at first, the company usually responds by adding additional FUEL to the marketing machine. 

It’s like pressing the accelerator in your car to make it go faster.

Far less often, he went on to say, do those organizations ever consider the question of FRICTION. Nordgren defined friction as any force that provides resistance to the person taking the desired action. He gave the example of a furniture store in suburban Chicago that invited customers to design their own custom couches. People stayed involved in the design process right up to the point of actually making the purchase. When it came time to buy, most people stepped away and declined.

When the store turned its attention from FUEL to FRICTION, they discovered that a lot of people backed out of the sale because of FRICTION. In this case, they did not have a plan for what to do with their old couch once they bought the new one. When the store changed its marketing message to say, “AND we will pick up your old couch for FREE!” they found that sales SOARED.

“Very interesting,” I hear you say. “But what does all this have to do with the Christian life?”

Glad you asked. As a Christ follower, I am aware of three distinct commandments I received from Jesus: 1.) Love God (with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength), 2.) Love my neighbor as myself, and 3.) Make disciples. 

All three bring their own special challenges. But I have to admit I am most regularly challenged by that third one; making disciples. I continuously ask myself: how do I do that? Regularly, consistently, effectively, and compassionately?

And no, making disciples has nothing to do with the process of SELLING in any way, shape, or form. But the podcast made me ask myself: do I think more about adding FUEL to my discipleship message? Or am I willing to do the hard work of examining the points of FRICTION that keep that message from connecting to its audience?

Because adding FUEL is easy. You just step on the gas! 

Examining the sources and causes of FRICTION is a whole lot harder. It means asking hard questions. It means LISTENING. It means taking stock of one’s comfortable, habitual behaviors and daring to make changes. It means putting oneself into the shoes of the people you are trying to communicate with and thinking about what matters most to THEM.

And so, in this era of rapid decline in church membership and religious affiliation, we might be tempted to modify Christ’s message so we can reduce friction and “smooth the way” on the path to discipleship. Pastors and members alike feel the pressure to fill those empty buildings and attain new relevance. 

And I must admit, the idea holds some appeal on the surface. These days there seems to be a whole lot of friction when it comes to making disciples for Jesus Christ.

But Jesus himself didn’t seem to care much about the whole concept of friction when it comes to discipleship. He sounds unequivocal about the difficulties of the path when, in three of the four Gospels, he offers some version of this guidance: “If any wish to come after me, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” (Matthew 16:24, Mark 8:34, and Luke 9:23. Luke then doubles down and repeats essentially the same command in chapter 14, verse 27.) 

In another part of Matthew’s gospel, we hear him say, “For the gate is narrow and the road is hard that leads to life, and there are few who find it.” (Matthew 7:14, NRSVU). 

So… what do you think? Add fuel? Decrease friction? Or stay on the sidelines and leave this to the professionals? 

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Abundant blessings;

23
Oct
19

GLOW

support groupMy wife GLOWs.

Every fourth Thursday of the month.

From 5:30 to 7:00.

And because she GLOWs, we glow (and grow) together as a family.

You see, GLOW is the name of the women’s cancer support group Joan attends at a nearby church. In an amazingly providential stroke, it turned out that there was a GLOW meeting last year on the exact same day she received her cancer diagnosis.

She has been going (and GLOWing) ever since.

GLOW is not necessarily a reference to the fact that many of the group’s members have undergone radiation therapy for their cancer. It is an acronym. It stands for God Loves Outrageous Women.

The GLOW Girls are indeed outrageous. Outrageously optimistic. They are also fierce. They are funny. They laugh together and they cry together. Sometimes they go to lunch together.

They also pray together. A LOT.

When the GLOW Girls gather on the fourth Thursday of the month, they share information with each other. For example, one woman got a lot of relief for the neuropathy in her feet from acupuncture. So she shared the name and phone number of her acupuncturist.

They share their joys, and much too regularly they share their sorrows.

I have never personally found myself on the receiving end of devastating news like a cancer diagnosis like Joan has. I have, however, gone through the devastation of a divorce. I have felt the anguish and soul-searching and the sting of a hundred “what ifs” that are all part of that terrible journey.

Divorce plunged me into moments of searing loneliness… a loneliness so deep I felt like I would never emerge from it.

And because of that experience, I also know what it feels like when someone extends a hand into that loneliness and says, “Hey there. I see you. I know what’s happening. I’ve been there.”

It felt a lot like what I imagine a drowning man might feel when grabbing hold of a life preserver.

At some point along the way, every one of us will have to travel through a dark valley. Those valleys will each be different and unique, but they will share some basic characteristics. They will frighten us, they will arouse anger, they will shake our faith to its core.

They will also try to isolate us and make us feel alone and defenseless.

When the time comes for your dark valley, I pray you will also be blessed by the gift of a supportive community… just like I found with my friend. Just like Joan has found with the GLOW Girls.

Honestly, though, communities can’t cure you. They can’t take your pain and fear away. They can’t magically change the dire nature of whatever it is you are facing.

But they can remind you that you are not alone. They can serve as a tangible, flesh-and-blood representation of the loving Creator who walks beside you through this dark moment.

They can help you laugh. They can help you cry. They can join you for lunch. They can recommend a good acupuncturist.

They can also help you carry your impossible burden, just like Paul tells us we are supposed to do: “Bear one another’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2, NRSV).

 

… and they just might help you glow a little when things get really dark.




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