They were all there.
Standing close. Knowingly nudging each other. Laughing.
Sharing so much more than space and time.
They were sharing themselves.
It was the place I desperately wanted to be but couldn’t.
I watched them and ached.
Left out.
At one time or another, each of us has known the pain of standing on the outside looking in. We know that pain because belonging is a core human hunger. Some contend that the central truth of the Genesis creation story is the reminder that we were divinely created for connection with others.
When that connection is missing in our lives, we seek it as ferociously as a mother seeking her lost child.
This time of year can be a time when those vital human connections are revived. When we seek the warmth and shelter of community. When we revel in relationships. Hearths are kindled, carols are sung, and hot toddies are poured, as much to warm our souls as our bodies.
Which makes it even more important to recognize that this season can also serve as a stinging reminder of emptiness for some of our neighbors. As they watch us clink our cups of wassail and deck our halls, they feel a deep stab of loneliness, reminded of a joy they once felt.
There we are, gathered gaily around the hearth while they stand outside in the cold, sobbing at the window.
I am not sure I have ever referenced Saturday Night Live here in this space, but there’s a first time for everything! Just this past Saturday, December 10, the cold open sketch (called, appropriately, Blocking it Out for Christmas) was all about the time-honored practice of using the Christmas season as a time to stuff down all our fears, anxieties, griefs, and sorrows and pretend to, “eat, drink, and be merry.”
Here is that link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRjjKVRaAik
My prayer for today is that we each remember we don’t have to “block it out,” or ignore the pain that can often be the unwelcome guest at our Christmas celebrations. Instead, let this season be a reminder that just as God became “enfleshed” as a tiny baby, we are each called to similarly enflesh our love for one another in practical acts.
Abundant Christmas blessings;
Thanks Russell. That’s really helpful and thought-provoking. Intentionally including all is so important… and sometimes including myself as I am is even harder
Yes! Thanks for that great reminder. Often that is the most challenging act of inclusion, isn’t it?
Thank you for this.
12-20-22
Just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday Russell. Hope you had a great day. I don’t have your email address but thought you might see our wishes here. We also want to wish you and Joan a very Merry Christmas and the best of New Years. ~ Jeanne & Bill Casey
Thank you so much, Jeanne. That is very thoughtful of you. Christmas blessings to you and Bill, also. How is he doing these days? I am sure this time of year is extra hard when a loved one is struggling.
By the way, my email is: revruss1220@gmail.com if you ever want to communicate directly.